Dear fellow shoppers at Barnes and Noble:
Yes, you. The ones who are staring. While I am absolutely thrilled to give you a front row seat to our meltdown, please know that when you stare, I feel judged. I feel as if you are confirming my biggest fear: that yes I am failing as a mama.
While it may look like I am doing it all wrong and you may wonder why in the world I tried to feed my toddler in the café at Barnes and Noble when he is obviously overtired. Please know that I am desperately trying to do it ALL right. But this load, the load that only I am carrying, well, sometimes it is too much. Sometimes I can only stumble through the day.
Haven’t you ever had a toddler who finds it funny to throw his food? Or a toddler who refuses to listen? Haven’t you ever felt overwhelmed? Haven’t you ever felt like everything is falling apart?
In this moment – when my toddler falls, hits his head, and starts screaming, while I try desperately to console him AND clean up our lunch – I needed more than stares. I needed more than judgment. I could have used a “hey are you okay?” or “how can I help?” or “we have all been there.” I could have used grace and empathy and compassion. I could have used the reminder, that as mamas we are all in this together.
Just maybe your words could have stopped my tears. Maybe the scene would have played out differently – maybe it would not have ended with both of us crying as we rush to the parking lot. Maybe it could have looked like love and like hope.
So here’s to you fellow mamas, the ones who have ever stumbled through the day:
While the world may not offer the love you need – we at Tapestry do. We are a community of mamas pursuing the struggle of life together. Because yes – sometimes days are like this, sometimes days are just plain hard.
Xo – B